Fourth Sunday of Advent
December 21, 2025
Matthew 1:18-25

One of my occupational job hazards, is that I don’t really see my family at Christmas. You know, I’ve got other things going on. Sure, we’ll go to Houston this Tuesday to see my sister and her family, and have dinner with my parents. And we’ll do presents and all that – but it’s still not Christmas. And even when I do go to see my family before Christmas, it’s not like I can relax. I mean, the big show is almost here. I’m there with my family, but really I’m thinking about my Christmas Eve sermon, I’m wondering if all the acolytes are going to show up, if the flowers will be there, if all the bulletins are printed correctly. Sure, I’m there with my family opening presents, but all this other stuff is hanging over my head.

And part of my worry, is because I know the church is going to be packed on Christmas Eve, and I want everyone to have a beautiful experience with God. I worry, because the church will be packed with people who don’t usually come to church. The Christmas and Easter people. You know them. They have trouble sitting through the service, they fumble around in the hymnal, they don’t know where to go for communion, and worst of all, worst of all – they sit in your pew. How dare they.

But, we can look at it another way. Because, you know, I was once a Christmas and Easter person. That was my family. Really. We were the ones who showed up twice a year, unprepared, fidgety, not knowing how to take communion or what it even was. We were the ones who sat in your pew. And yet, by the grace of God, here I am. Surely, God has a sense of humor.

And yet, it’s more than that. For all those people who will be coming on Christmas Eve, the people we hardly ever see and the people we will never see again; well, they are also our brothers and sisters in Christ. That’s why I’ve never gone for shaming people who only show up for the big days. If what we believe is true, that in Christ, by virtue of baptism, we are all children of God; well, those twice a year church people are my family in Christ just as much as you are, the people who bother to come to church on December 21. If they are my brothers and sisters in Christ, though I hardly ever see them, then I ought to treat them with the same measure of respect, grace, and love. 

This is not just a way to grow a church; it’s not about welcoming visitors; it’s deeply theological, rooted in the holy scriptures. Take Joseph, for example, the father, as it was thought, of Jesus. That’s what this whole story is about. Joseph, a righteous man, is engaged to Mary, but they are not yet wed. When she is found to be pregnant, Joseph plans to break up with her quietly, to dismiss her. I know that seems harsh, and it is. To cast out this young, unwed, and pregnant woman; it’s a sign of the cruel world into which Jesus was born. But it’s important to remember, that the Old Testament book of Deuteronomy says that if a woman is married and then later found to not be a virgin, it was permitted to stone her to death (22:20-21).

So, imagine what Joseph is thinking about it. He’s engaged to this woman. She’s found to be with child. He doesn’t want to punish her, but he also wants to be true to his faith. He doesn’t want to expose her to public disgrace. So he lies to down to sleep one night, with all this running through his mind.

And that is precisely where God steps in. Like another Joseph long ago, God speaks to this Joseph in a dream. The angel of the Lord appears to Joseph in a dream, as he’s surely tossing and turning with all this weighing on his mind. And the angel of the Lord reassures him. The angel says, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit” (Matthew 2:20). And what Joseph does next is surely an act of faith, an example for all of us. With courage, with trust in God’s word, Joseph takes on Jesus as his own son. Not by blood, not by family, but through grace. Joseph risks public shame, he risks scandal, he risks all his neighbors gossiping about him; he’s running the risk of showing himself as an unrighteous man. And yet it’s that risk that actually proves his faithfulness. Shortly after this, Joseph will have another dream. The angel of the Lord tells Joseph to get up, to take his wife, to take his adopted son, and flee to Egypt. To escape the cruelty of Herod who wishes to kill the child. Joseph is a hero of the faith. Yes, Mary says yes to God and accepts this child from on high. And, Joseph risks his own life not for his own flesh and blood, but for this child whom he has taken on for his own son. That is grace. The faithful example of two loving, and courageous parents.. 

Joseph not only shows us how to adopt one another as family, but he shows us what it means to follow Jesus. It is good that we continue to hear about Mary but after these stories, we never about Joseph again. And you know what? That’s okay. And that’s probably the point. By drifting out of the story, it keeps our eyes fixed on Jesus. It also tells us that being faithful is not the same thing as being famous; faithfulness is not something we should boast about. Our trust in God can be as simple as this. Joseph did what he was called to do, to be as a father to Jesus. And that was enough. Jesus plays the starring role, not Joseph. That is the grace of a Christian life. You don’t have to play the starring role. We are all just bit actors who have our role to play, in quiet faithfulness, and then, thanks be to God, we fade into the background.

So the first lesson is this – in Christ, in the church, we are not bound by blood, by family. We are bound by something deeper – the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ. The invitation from God to call each other brothers and sisters. This is a radical thing. For people like us, who don’t have the same heritage, who don’t come from the same places, who don’t all have the same values, to become one family because we share one common confession – that Jesus is Lord. Joseph is the example for us. He had the courage and the trust to adopt a child who was not his own, through faith in the Lord God. We, too, then are to treat each other as brothers and sisters. As if we have adopted each other, through faith, to love and care for each other. I’m not saying that will be easy. Goodness knows, family is hard. But we must believe that the waters of baptism run deeper than the blood of family. This is the grace of God – that people who have no family, do have a family. That people who are from nowhere, are found here. That everybody, every single soul has a family in Christ. Whether they show up every Sunday or just twice a year.

And that’s the other lesson I take away. I think about all those hundreds of people that are going to show up on Christmas Eve. Those strangers. Like Jesus was to Joseph, they are to us. People who have shown up unexpected, unannounced. And yet, they are from God. As Joseph adopts Jesus as his own son, we will take them in as our own brothers and sisters. And what’s more – is that you never know what will become of them. Joseph probably had an inkling of what was going on with Jesus. I mean, it’s not every night that an angel of the Lord speaks to you. But for us, we do not know what God will do with the people who come into our doors. You never know, maybe they will start coming every Sunday. Maybe they are seeking some grace and comfort and belonging. Maybe they are lonely and need a place to find friends. Maybe they are hungry and looking to learn more. Maybe one day it will be one of them, standing where I am today. I tell you – the only reason I am here today, is because that little church, where we snuck in on Christmas and Easter, was kind to us. And as I grew older and more curious, and I started going more often, they took me in. They were Joseph to me.

So I don’t see Christmas and Easter as a chance to welcome visitors. That’s the wrong way to look at it. No, it’s a great joy when all our brothers and sisters Christ are finally gathered, together, around one table. This is our family reunion, not by blood, but by grace.